From Bulbapedia, the community-driven Pokémon encyclopedia.
NOTE: This page has not been updated since 2009 (hence the poor grammar, outdated templates, and terrible jokes) and I have no plans to update this page at all in the foreseeable future. I'm not even sure this belongs on Bulbapedia. But until I decide on what to do with it, or where to take it, it will remain here for the time being. I wouldn't even reccomend commenting on the talk page. If you'd like to comment on this page, either send me a message on the forums, or on Twitter. Links for those are on my userpage.
What do you think? Head on over to the talk page!
By the way, I AM NOT DOING EEVEE EVOLUTIONS. So stop asking.
BST = Base Stat Total. I'm trying to keep these legit.
Evolutions
Gen I
Pokémon
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Picture
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Why
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Stats
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Name/Type
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How
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Thoughts
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Farfetch'd
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Because he's useless.
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Ninjetch'd
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Level-up while holding a Learner's Sword and having Swords Dance
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If that leek becomes swordlike, then we got us a ninja duck. BST=525
With help from: TTEchidna
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Onix
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Onix = Fast Steelix = Slow
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Drillix
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Trade with Super Quick Claw
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The name needs work, but just imagine seeing a drill shaped Steelix. A bit more streamline and less steely. BST=510
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Kingler
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Low Special Defense prevents this hard hittin' crab from really being useful.
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Klanger
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A Water Stone that isn't the one we already have now.
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By sacrificing speed, Klanger can wall, and then start kicking some tail on the battlefield. BST=520
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Pinsir
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Why not? Pinsir is awesome, but thanks to Heracross, Pinsir is relegated to a forgotten classic. Lets kick him up a notch!
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Guiloreap
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Trade with Evil Pendant
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The name needs work, it's Guillotine & Reaper. I wanted Guillocutioner, but thats obviously way too big. BST=535
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Arbok
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Well, he does have a group of Ekans to look after, doesn't he?
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Nohtyp
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Level-Up with Mud Shot in the <insert Gen V desert name>
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I was debating giving him a second type. Given the fact that he used Dig a lot in the anime, and learns Mud Bomb, why not? BST=520
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Marowak
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Think of Gen I, that and she's not great, and can't defend with those stats..
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Protektull
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♀
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Cubone's mom. Thick Club no longer works. This mother must protect her young! "The Graveyard Pokémon" BST=510
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Marowak
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Think of Gen I, that and he's not great, and he's waaaay to slow..
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Punishkull
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♂
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Cubone's dad. Thick Club no longer works. This father will now commence bringing the pain. "The Punisher Pokémon" BST=510
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Golduck
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Golduck is pretty good, but, theres a type problem...
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Minduck
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Psy Stone
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Same BST as Golduck, and the name is terrible, but why isn't Psyduck part Psychic?? BST=500
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Persian
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Persian is rather bad, so, why not?
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TBD
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Somthing Team Rocket invented? idk...
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Normal/Dark? or pure Dark? Guess i'll say here that ive always hoped TR's Meoth would evolve. BST=510
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Sandslash
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Popular, cool looking, but really not that great. You would expect him to be fast, but he really isn't.
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Sandstryk
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Level-up with Evil Pendant
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And now Sandslash has some worth, not that he's horrific right now anyway, but if you have to struggle a little to really enjoy it, then some changes need to be made. BST=525
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Gen II
Pokémon
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Picture
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Why
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Stats
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Name/Type
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How
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Thoughts
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Sudowoodo
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The joke was good at first, but it's old now.
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Treowoodo
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Level-up with Golden Seed while knowing Wood Hammer
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Ok, so this still isn't that great, but whatever. The name is derived from "tréowe" which is Latin for "True". BST=505
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Unown
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They're considered legendary, but are far from it.
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King Unown
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Level-up with Ancient Crown
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This prob the only time a normal Pokémon would evolve into a legendary, but I think it makes sense. I'm not sure if it would retain its Hidden Power only movepool or not, but basically I just doubled all the stats. BST=672
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Dunsparce
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Another Pokémon I just don't understand.
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Mattare
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Some sort of Rock or Ground-type stone.
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Make it look more menacing, and you've got a real land snake. BST=515
With help from: Pokemaniac102
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Skarmory
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180 MPH? The Pokédex lies again.
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Jetmach
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Level-up with Super Quick Claw
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A Pokémon that looks like a supersonic jet? I'm all for that. The stats are the same BST as Skar, only less defense and more speed, similar to Scyther and Scizor. BST=465
Credit: Random279
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Ariados
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Giant spiders are cool, so, where are the stats to back it up?
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Arantula
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Level-up near Chemical Plant
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Last time I checked, spiders wern't slow either. BST=515
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Magcargo
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Good idea, Bad follow through.
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Snailnum
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???
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The name sucks (combo of snail and common metal suffix), and its still horrible. Magcargo is just a lost cause. BST=510
With help from: MetalMetroid997
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Donphan
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Pretty cool in the show, kinda meh in the game.
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Centriphan
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Some sort of Rock or Ground-type stone.
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This will seem like an odd addition, but hear me out. Same BST as Donphan, but a focus on speed and power. Awesome. Name is a combination of "Centrifugal" referring to it's spinning like a wheel, and with the added "phan" from others. BST=500
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Gen III
Pokémon
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Picture
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Why
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Stats
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Name/Type
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How
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Thoughts
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Masquerain
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Surskit is a cool little bug that has an awesome and unique type combination. Then it gets ruined by Masquerain, a completely and totally unremarkable Bug/Flying moth. This needs to be fixed.
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Surstride
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A Water Stone that isn't the one we already have now.
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Not the most powerful thing, but it isn't supposed to be. This would be a balanced, low tier Pokémon and a heck of a lot of fun to play with, as well as being just plain cool. BST=500
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Mawile
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Mawile is cool, but the stats aren't there, and nether is its type..
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Jawile
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Trade holding Suudsu Glass
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Lets put that mouth to good use, lets make it really look like a Steel type. BST=530
Credit: TTEchidna
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Chimecho
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Chimecho isn't bad, but it lacks real punch.
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Ringust
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Psy Stone
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I'm really bad at these names...I'm pretty sure Chimecho will get an evolution in the next Gen or two. Also, it's a wind chime, but it isnt part flying type? BST=515
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Tropius
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He's big and ferocious looking, but, he isn't.
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Tropiryu
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Level-up with Dragon Tooth
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Grass/Dragon hasn't been done yet, but more importantly, now Tropius has some meaning! BST=530
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Banette
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The other Gen III ghost (Dusclops) got an evo.
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Crumpette
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Trade with Suudsu Glass
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A rather quick and thoughtless addition, but, whatever. BST=520
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Gen IV
Pokémon
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Picture
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Why
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Stats
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Name/Type
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How
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Thoughts
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Pachirisu
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As Farfetch'd above, Pachi exists with seemingly no inherent meaning. So, unfortunately for the ungodly amount of people who like the stupid thing, its just a dark spot on their team, only seeing battles against similarly useless Pokémon.
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Hikourisu
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idk, plagiarism?
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This opens the door for a strategy I can already see being abused horribly. Thunder Wave + Whirlwind. Yikes. But at least this evolution gives some real meaning to it, and gives fans something they can at least use. The name is Hikou meaning "Flying" and Risu meaning "Squirrel". BST=505
Credit: Kenji-girl - NOTE: This was created well before Emolga.
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Chatot
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Chatot utilizes a really cool sound thing that we're all familiar with. However, what's the point of using it, if the ensuing damage isn't enough to kill, in which case, Chatot then gets decimated?
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Yammerot
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Level-up knowing Megaphone
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Well, it still wouldn't see much, if any, use online, but, at least if you want to use it in single play, you can! The name is from "Yammer on" + Chatot. BST=505
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Pre-Evolutions
Gen I
Gen II
Gen III
Gen IV